Woman Escapes Worst Date of Her Life, Calls Radio Station

February 9, 2019

We’ve all had bad dates and as AJR has recently reminded us, those bad dates just make us more interesting at parties, thus making us more intriguing and opening up further opportunities for bad dates and the vicious cycle just continues. 

That’s what that song’s about right?

Well, one date up in Suffern, NY on Friday night was so bad, no AJR song could help - not even that one that has Rivers Cuomo on it.

Apparently some bozo was such a bore, he drove his date Melissa (Before anyone yells at me, She said I could use her name) to the bathroom to call into The Nightcap.

Look, you’re never going to be everybody’s cup of tea, but imagine being such a snooze that your date goes to a restroom to call a radio station. 

Lame jokes? Maybe she’ll text a friend. Just no chemistry? Mom’ll get that out of her over coffee tomorrow morning. Think about this. Melissa called ALT 92.3, the most listened to Alternative radio station in North America. This guy was such a dud, Melissa felt it her responsibility to warn the greater population of three different U.S. states.

So congratulations Melissa. You’ll now be remembered among the likes of Paul Revere, Edward Snowden and that NBA referee who got busted for betting on games as some of the greatest whistleblowers in U.S. history.