VALENTINES DAY PRO-TIP: FART UP A STORM!

February 14, 2019

Happy Valentine’s Day! I hope you’re celebrating with someone or something you love. Maybe that’s your significant other. Maybe that’s a side piece. Maybe that’s multiple side pieces cuz you’ve been killin’ it on the apps lately and your whole afternoon is booked because of it. Whatever the case may be, today is a day all about romance.

But, what do you do when that romance is one-sided? We’ve all been there - you think the date is going well, your jokes are landing, they’ve only checked their phone maybe three times…four times max, you are on fire! Then it comes time to ask about date no. 2 and they’re iffy or even more tragic, you go in for the smooch and they respectfully decline.

What’s the best way out of these situations if you happen to find yourself on the other end and you’re nervous about having to be a jerk and embarrass them to their face. The Nightcap is here to answer that question and the answer is quite simple. FART.

Yeah, FART. CAPS LOCK F-A-R-T. Start breaking wind. Start rippin’ some good ole stinkerooskies. Let the gas out. Le Stench fly as they say in France.

(LEGAL DISCLAIMER: I HAVE NEVER BEEN TO FRANCE NOR DO I SPEAK FRENCH)

At least that’s what one caller told me last night on the show, citing personal experience. Click the video below to listen and wait for the plot twist. (SPOILER: HIS DATE WAS INTO IT!)